Be Present.

You have 3 – 5 years with your little one at home with you before preschool or kindergarten. This is the most formative time of their development. If there’s one thing I can guarantee, it’s that you will never regret being fully present for them in that time.

My second child was about to enter kindergarten. My neighbor asked about my career plans once August arrived. My mind was reeling of how drastic the change would be, about how exciting it would be to have a full day to work on my business and blissfully shut if off at night when my five-year-old interrupted my thoughts and said, “What? My mom doesn’t work.”

He skipped off.

In the five years of his sweet life, he had only seen me as mom. I didn’t expect it. There were definitely times I felt I was failing at the work-and-stay-at-home mom thing. I wasn’t trying to hide my work by any means and he had actually tagged along on various pick-ups of print collateral and t-shirt orders for clients, but in some small way the intentional effort to be fully present had come through.

Please note, I’m not asking you to DO EVERYTHING THEY SAY and I’m NOT encouraging you to DO EVERYTHING WITH THEM. Actually, they need time to play and discover on their own. It will be the greatest blessing to your day that they can play independently.

Being present is turning to listen to them when they’re babbling out a story as they are learning to talk. Being present is looking into their eyes to see their pride when they bring you that dandelion. Being present is giving yourself permission to let the rest of the world melt away for a bit. Your business projects will want to seep in or make you feel guilty for not noticing them. Don’t be distracted.

Tips on being present:

• Check your phone on the hour. Not in between and not every hour if you don’t need to, but just on the hour as if you’ve been in a meeting for that hour. Because you have been. That meeting was with your child.
• Respond to business-related emails when your child is engaged in something else. When it’s rest time or Sesame Street time. For longer responses, push it to a time you can focus on the message and your partner or sitter help is with them.
• Take a lot of photos. Don’t post them on social, but take them. You’ll be glad you can share their day with your partner and extended family. Consider creating a private photo blog for your family to share them or shared photo album space.
• Include your child in the household chores. Folding laundry may take all day this way, but making sock balls and having them gather and put them in the basket can be a game for them and a way for you to be present even when accomplishing small tasks.

The bonus? Once you practice being fully present for 3 – 5 years, you create a habit that serves you, your partner and your children well moving beyond those early years. We’ll need it when we hit the teens.